rebirth/baptism.

I had a conversation with my good friends Yi Khy and Lorraine today about words and their value. It stemmed off from watching a film called "HOWL," about the poem of the same name and it's author, Allen Ginsberg. What began as a discussion about obscenity and government intervention turned into us inspiring each other to pick up pens or type out our lives. The conversation essentially concluded with us committing to all start blogging. Lorraine already blogs, Yi Khy never blogged before, and I had lost motivation to do it. We had every part of the spectrum covered.

One thing we touched on was how writing helps you remember the important lessons you've learned along your way. I come to realizations at least weekly, but I forget easily. God has to teach me the same lesson over and over. It's annoying and frustrating for both of us, I think. I'm giving this spot on the Internet a rebirth for this reason: to help me remember my lessons. I figure with the three years I've given it to die, it's a quiet enough place to speak honestly.



I'm learning about baptism lately. Being brought up with a weak understanding of my baptism, I accepted this part of my faith from my parents, and never truly wrestled with it until recently. My childhood church explained things by calling my relationship with God a "covenant" relationship, which it is. They told me I did nothing to deserve God's love, that I am part of God's family because of God's faithfulness, not my own, which is true. God chose me before I chose him, and baptism is a symbol of God choosing me. My parents may be the ones bringing me in front of the church and dedicating me to the Lord, but the Lord baptizes me. Baptism is not fire insurance (as Pastor Glenn puts it), or any kind of guarantee. It is an act of faithfulness, going both ways between God and my parents. In all of it, both God and my parents show faithfulness to me, too. I've seen it as a beautiful tradition; a true understanding of the sacrament.

But is that what baptism really is? I read the Bible, I read the examples given to us of baptism, and I'm not so sure. Jesus is circumcised as a child, in accordance to the Old Covenant, and then, when he is ready to begin his ministry, has John baptize him. He comes to John for baptism. And so does every person baptized before and afterward. They all come to be baptized. They make a decision. They all experience baptism. I have been baptized, but I have never experienced it. I committed myself to Christ, but without symbol.

I see a symbol for both areas in Christ's life. He is circumcised at (or near) birth, and then is baptised at his rebirth, or movement from prior life into ministry. And yet, Paul tells us circumcision is not necessary, so we Christians have no symbol for covenant making at a child's birth unless we baptize them then. I guess the issue I'm having with both traditions of baptism is that both of them leave a gaping hole. They both have traditions for bringing a child into covenant with God, and they both have one for someone making that step toward Christ, but in both understandings, one of the traditions seems insufficient for me. The simple dedication of a baby doesn't have enough weight to it, and neither does a simple "profession of faith," I think. Symbols give experiences in our lives significance. Both these moments seem to need one, no?